God is NOT a Runner!

I've just figured this out!

Summer was definitely not created by a runner and God created the seasons, so . . . without a doubt . . . GOD is NOT a runner!

All this time I've been thinking that running is good for you. We strengthen our aerobic capacity, our energy increases, we live longer . . . damn . . . I just had this superiority feeling being a runner. I wasn't taking the easy way out! I wasn't allowing my body to deteriorate. I was working hard at getting myself in the very best physical shape possible.

This "running thing" is hard . . . and I'll be rewarded for the effort! I mean, damn, I've run marathons, I've run 50ks and I've even run a 50 miler! These weren't easy. They were hard! Damn hard! And all this time I thought I was doing the right thing! Trying to keep my fitness at a high level.

But now I now I know the sad truth . . . it doesn't matter. God doesn't care if I run 12 marathons a year or not! He doesn't care if I've only run one. Truth be told, he is not a runner!

Only a runner can appreciate the pain and suffering associated with a mid-day 6 mile run in 95 degree temps and 90 degree humidity. Only a runner understands the mental power it takes to finish a 20 miler on a hot, humid mid-summer run. The pain! The mental focus needed to run through the pain! If God isn't a runner, he wouldn't "get it!"

If he "got it" he might still let it get warm . . . there are plenty of other folks who like warm / hot weather! But there is no way he would let BOTH the temperature AND the humidity climb to opressive levels. One or the other but definitely not both!

Okay . . . so this isn't going to get me into heaven! But at least I know I've gotten through (or am getting through!) the summer "dog days!" I know I'm still trudging on! And come the fall, cooler weather, I'll be better off! There WILL be a payback!

But I was really thinking this would help me get into heaven! I already knew my "flag decal won't get me into heaven anymore!"

(okay . . . who remembers this last line? There is beer in it for you if you know!!!)