Monday, December 13, 2010

61-year old runner - available for immediate adoption!

If you live on Kiawah Island and have ever wanted a son, I am your man . . . er . . son! 

The advantages of an older son are tremendous:
  • Think about the joys of having your son cut you grass, and do assorted odd jobs . . . the day he comes to your home!
  • I'm already potty-trained.  No diaper needed . . . at least for a few more years!
  • You don't have to worry about getting your house trashed with a wild party when you go out of town . . .neighbors won't complain about too much noise EVER!
  • This son won't sleep 'till noon every day, nor will he wake you in the middle of the night to be fed.
  • You don't have to worry about the costs of a college education etc, as that has all been paid.
  • Adolescence is over!  No raging hormones to deal with! And if you are considering the adoption of an older female, no worries about menopause at all!
  • No crazy legal papers to fill out.  Just ask me and I'm yours!  Just change your will to include me!
My only really bad habit is a minor running addiction.

                   Just post a comment on this blog if you're interested!

Now for a race report from the Kiawah Island Marathon this last weekend . . .

I first met Dave Hinshaw and Brian Wilcox at about the 7 mile point of the 2007 Richmond Marathon.  Obviously, they aren't a very discerning pair and are not good judges of character, as the three of us struck up a friendship and have stayed in touch ever since.  Dave and I later ran the OBX marathon in 2009 and Brian and I met up at Boogie in 2010 where I get my annual dose of humble pie!. 

The fourth member of the this year's crew was Dave's brother, John, who was doing his first marathon!

Four friend, three goals and two successes!  And a really fun weekend!

Let's get the bummers out of the way right off!
  • Brian Wilcox didn't qualify for Boston!  Missed it by a measly 32 seconds! and
  • Dave Hinshaw didn't get the PR he was hoping for.
But the big deal was John completed his first marathon!!  Now, THAT is a big deal!

Friday Afternoon -

The four of us descended on John's Kiawah home Friday afternoon.  For me, finally getting there was quite a relief:  1) my brand new heat pump quite working the afternoon before I left and temps were in the 20s, 2) my daughter was having a kidney stone trying to pass and 3) I had car trouble on the way to Kiawah.

Once there we went to pickup our packets and John drove us around the course.  Nice and flat!  There is nothing quite like the excitement of someone doing their first marathon!  John was actually pretty calm and cool about the coming race, but you could still sense his excitement . . . reading compulsively from some marathon guide book for last minute tips!  I loved hearing he and Dave talk about all the hints they had read!  I can't believe all the things I've been doing wrong!  :-)

We decided to cook dinner at John's house and hit the bed early for a 5 am wake up to guarantee us good parking.

Saturday -
Up a five, showers, breakfast and we headed to the race!  Since John is a homeowner we had great access and parked about a two minute walk from the start!!  NICE!
Brian, Dave and John Saturday AM before we started!

Temperatures were in the high 40s and a light rain.  About 30 minutes before the race started, the rain intensity picked up to a steady rain . . . not heavy at first, but we were all drenched the first 13 miles.

Kiawah is definitely an beautiful, upscale place.  hundreds and hundreds of beautify homes broken by picturesque salt marshes, lagoons and golf courses.  Sensory overload!  Nice course and one of the best organized races I've been to.  Everything was just 'easy.'  But a marathon is still a marathon.  None are easy.

I should have worn gloves but I didn't think it was that cold!  But at about mile 4 I picked up a pair of gloves someone had thrown down!  Sweet!  They helped a lot, but I was cool all day long!

At about mile 7 or so I met Jennifer Swain from Atlanta who was making Kiawah her first marathon.  Jennifer and I were back and forth all day and she ended up beating me by 1 second though our clock time was 30 seconds apart!

The first loop was uneventful with all the 1/2 marathoners keeping us company.  Once we started the second lap things got sparse fairly quickly.  Just after the turn, I met Carolyn Smith, a neat young pharmacist from St. John's Island, SC doing her first marathon. So Carolyn joined me running 3 minutes and walking one, while Jennifer held her running 2 1/2 minutes and walking one. and the three of us wound our way through the island.

Carolyn, Dave and John just havin' fun!

Jenn, Me and Carolyn at 18

At about mile 18 or so we caught up with Dave and John.  Had the take the expected pictures and we all continued on.  Carolyn and I soon decided to change two a 2/1 interval and we moved ahead somewhat.  By mile 22 Carolyn started suffering and fell back but Jenn and I pushed on.  Actually, Jenn pulled ahead quite far but I did manage to close the gap some by the end!

A good day for me . . . 5:33.  Carolyn was just behind finishing her first marathon in 5:43.

And just behind Carolyn came Dave and John . . . brother's staying together the whole way and holding hands crossing the finish line!  Very Cool!!
John and Dave at the finish!!

As I was coming to the finish, Brian joined me the the finish line and told me the news about missing Boston by 32 seconds.  I was soooooo disappointed for him but still a 13 minute PR is totally awesome!!
Brian, John, Dave and I once the pain ended!!

To celebrate, that night John took Dave, Brian and I to dinner at  'Cassique' . . . for one of the best meals I've ever had!  It is hard to imagine just how good mash potatoes can be!!  And short ribs . . . my goodness!So much fun with these three guys!

More pictures


  1. Sounds like a great race, Frank! And great company... that always makes it fun!

  2. You would be a wonderful older son. I imagine that you can even carry out the trash!

    Sounds like you had one of those good races, but had so much fun. I am glad. You were ready for a fun marathon. Many years ago, I ran Kiawah and also found it to be very well organized and it was certainly flat. A beautiful place to hold an early winter marathon. Congratulations on an excellent run.

  3. @Rick - I'm all about carrying out the trash. It is actually a speciality of mine. I just hate to brag about it . . . me being so humble and all!

    You had another awesome run. You need to post some race reports yourself!!! Seriously!


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Littleton, North Carolina
World's Slowest Runner . . . well, at least in contention for the honor. Just your average "below average" runner.